Part 5

My bodies so sick of sadness. It's as if it seeps out of my pores and effects everyone around me. His honesty is so pure, it doesn't bother me one bit. It's refreshing actually how he takes all my negativity and TRANSFORMS it, into what exactly? I'm not sure. But I like it and I know that for sure. He makes it so I WANT to believe, so I want to make a change. Maybe I was wrong, maybe HE will be the reason why I heal. Maybe there is a sun bright enough to outshine the darkness. Maybe it's not love, but whatever it is I like it. And it's exactly what I need. My hands start to shake, time needs to slow down, give me more time. I need to heal, he is doing it. Just let me heal. His voice, my heart is telling me that's what I need. His words are like magic, and that's exactly what my black heart needs. Magic. I sound like a little girl again. He let's me hear it how it is. He won't let me go without a fight. He fights for me, no one has fought for me. It feels... Nice. The numbness is back; I feel sick to my stomach. It hurts SO bad. All I can do is move on.